The Rockingest Hemisphere Of Them All

I must admit to being more tense than I expected while listening to the closing stages of the rugby yesterday. Egg-chasing doesn't do a lot for me, it being the chosen form of physical torture employed at my school. What I love about it though is how many people are giving a shout out, not to their own club, not their own country, not even their own continent - no, let's hear it for the Northern Hemisphere ! The rockingest hemisphere of them all !

This really is taking the inclusive gang concept of international sport to the most ridiculous extreme. During Euro 2004, an Irish comic pointed out just how many "Old Enemies" we English actually have. Scotland, obv. Ireland, yes, the old enemy. France. Germany. Argentina. As he rightly observed, "Can't you fuckers get on with anybody ?". And yet now we're teaming up with all of these Old Enemies (well except Argentina), all in the name of that Hemisphere we love so much.

Despite our best efforts though, South Africa must still be favourites to take the trophy back to that evil smelly communist Southern Hemisphere. Hmmm. What we should do is get everyone together except one really wank country. The Faroe Islands maybe, oh no, hang on, they nearly beat Scotland once. How about American Samoa, no, they sound like they might be a bit handy at rugby. I don't know, fucking Andorra or someone. Let's all gang up together and pick on them. Then we'll be all the way back to the playground, which seems to be the whole point of international sport anyway.